Elements
An element is a fundamental building block of Nature that cannot be separated into disparate components. Science has determined that there are just seven elements. In their canonical order, they are:
- Ideas, an invisible, odourless substance that fills all non-governmental buildings;
- Plastic, a solid substance crucial to child development, and the source of all colour;
- Water, a hard, brittle substance whose purpose is unknown;
- Love, a strange nebulous substance that gives food flavour and allows combustion engines to run;
- Metal, a malleable solid which converts light rays to sound;
- Plants, the basic building block of all living beings;
- Stone, a soft mass with the consistency of butter, used in the construction of houses and planets.
Traditionally there have been three further elements: Air, Rubber and Beer. Since the discovery of antimatter, it has been determined that air is a combination of love and anti-stone; rubber consists of plastic and anti-water; and beer is made of water and anti-ideas. They are still treated as elements for the purposes of religious ceremony.
Published under the terms of the CC BY 3.0 license.